Thursday, October 1, 2009

Dear Chloe

Hello little one!

I can't believe it's been over a year since I wrote to you here. I got an email from a very nice lady named Katherine who sends you and all of us her best. Her mail sort of nudged me out of a "safer place" to get back here and write again. I've never met Katherine, but sometimes it's very good to know that we're not doing all of this alone and that there are wonderful people all over the world who care about others.

You're 4 years old now and in the newest pictures we've received, you look so big! And, as ever, so beautiful. =) It was sad to miss yet another birthday, but I hope you got the birthday present I sent. Your Mama said you did, but it's a little confusing because the things I sent at Easter and St. Patrick's Day came back to us undelivered, as did some of the things your Papa sent to you.

A lot of what your Mama does confuses me, little one. For awhile I thought that maybe she and Papa could work out a way for you to come back to visit. By the time you see this (if ever), you probably won't remember the day a few months ago that Mama called and let me talk to you on the phone, but I thought things were finally getting better. Your Mama sent me pictures so I could see how big you're getting and we actually seemed to be communicating. But the last email I got from Mama was very angry; I'm not sure why, she didn't say. Now she says you and she are moving and that we'll never see you again. It's like going right back to the beginning.

In any case, I'll still be sending things, so don't worry. I might have to send them to your other grandma's house, but hopefully she'll get them to you.

Papa misses you every single day. We don't talk about it as much as we used to because sometimes it feels like we've talked about everything there is to talk about. We don't have as much money as some of the other people who are going through this, so we can't afford a lot of lawyers and representatives as some others. But we just read a story on CNN about a Papa who went to jail in Japan because he tried to bring his little ones home, and it seems that his lawyers aren't having much more luck than we've had without. But just because we can't bring you home right now, that doesn't mean we've given up on you or that we love and miss you any less. We won't ever give up, Chloe.

It's October 1st, baby. =) I'll be sending you something for Halloween soon. But in the meantime, Grandpa says he loves you, Gracie says Hi (well....Gracie says "Woof! Woof! ;) and Dinky says that if you see any pictures of black cats this Halloween, he wants you to remember that he was the original. =P

I love you, Chloe.


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